Aiyya is a waakda film

Dreamum wakeupum in air-conditionum
Artham meaningum, logicumm sab shakeupum

Face to faceum pure farceumm
Start to endum pure tortureum

Raniumm competing with doggiesumm
Prithvirajum competing with stoneumm

Rani jumpingum, all time sniffingum
Prithvirajum paintingumm..we yawningumm

Wunde runde munde naale,
Minutes, hours, we countingum

Story, script, screenplay gone for tossumm
Body spray ad scriptum betterum

SMSing friendumm, FB’ing statusum,
Same to sameumm audience doingumm.

Top to baseum boresutram
Sigh!um eyesoreum, downright stupidum

Mindumm crazyiumm, why ticket boughtumm
Tweeting umm, Sleeping umm

Walking umm, halfway umm
No moreumm, this tortureumm…

If the above-mentioned waakda lyric doesn’t make sense to you, here’s the seedha version: Aiyya, (mis)directed by Sachin Kundalkar is an exaggerated version of the director’s short film, Gandha. (Why?). Rani Mukherjee, with all her Vidya Balanisms, or Amit Trivedi with his mellifluous compositions couldn’t salvage this film.

The only actor who really stands out is Subodh Bhave – the guy supposed to wed Meenaxi Deshpande (Rani Mukherjee). He is a diehard Farooq Sheikh and Deepti Naval fan (Makes you yearn for films like Saath Saath, Chashme Baddoor, and Katha).

Rani Mukherjee’s brother played by Ameya Wagh can be passed off as the modern avatar of the violin playing brother of Tina Munim in Baaton Baaton Mein. The desi version of Lady Gaga played by Anita Date is more of a Lady Dracula who sucks blood out of your brain each time she appears.

Aiyya is a classic case of s director’s penchant for indulgence. The stamp of Anurag Kashyap Films brought me to the auditorium, but the blot of screenplay forced me to walk out halfway, when the song, ‘Do do’ started playing. Mind you, I have weathered many a storms like Home Delivery, Kyun Ho Gaya Na, Rascals, Game, RGV Ki Aag, Mausam, but in hindsight, they all seem masterpieces now.


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