Shootout at Wadala leaves many answers unquestioned

To begin with, how did John Abraham survive to narrate the entire film after being literally (and royally) punctured by Anil Kapoor & Co.? Do jails really have such good gym trainers (with enough muscle to massal anyone) and cops who are cooperative enough to let its prisoners stay fit? Did Kangna Ranaut need money so badly that she agreed to play a character who almost gets raped by her hero until she succumbs to his advances? Why did all the three item songs sound the same? Aren’t Priyanka Chopra, Sunny Leone and Sophie Chaudhary portrayed as sex objects?

Why are there so many gaalis just for the heck of it? How did the writers come up with gems like ‘Main woh Bruce hoon jisne 8 saal se lee nahi..dekhoon ye purza chalta bhi hai’, ‘Saand kitna bhi akela ho uski hifazat ke liye hamesh bhaand hote hai’, and of course the famous, ‘Police ki goli mein itna loha hai ki ek baar thok di toh khoon mein kabhi iron ki kami nahi hogi’? How did Tushar Kapoor manage to bag the second lead role and waste the opportunity at the same time? Was it Manoj Bajpayi or his duplicate playing that ‘blink and you miss’ kind of role?

How did S. Hussain Zaidi let his book be exploited this way and why did he agree to write its screenplay? (Did he really have a say in the final screenplay?) Why wasn’t Manya Surve shown as a perfect strategist in a gang, as written in the book, ‘Dongri to Dubai’? Why was Kangna Ranaut wearing a constipated expression throughout the climax? Why do shootouts happen and inspire filmmakers like Sanjay Gupta to make films on them? Why did I decide to watch a film like this? Why am I writing this?

How many films like these will be made before they’re permanently banned? The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind, isn’t it?

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